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Somebody wake Dan Jenkins from his afternoon nap and fetch his slippers because there's a wayward PGA penis on the loose. Proud sportswriters, please test that resolution to ignore this type of tawdry checkbook journalism. By now, most of you in the mainstream media are inured to the ethical compromises that Deadspin and other information outlets of ill repute make. You hold yourselves at a safe remove and then report not necessarily on our stories themselves but on the "distractions" they cause. It's a nice arrangement, and I'm not complaining, and I'm certainly not advocating that you adopt our methods.

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